Way to Russia Talk Lounge

cyndy22 · Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2005 5:36 pm Post subject:

I have heard of lots of reasons for learning Russian but sailors is a new one! You're a beaut! Laughing

e · VIP Joined: 23 Apr 2005 Posts: 654

Well said comments Talula! Some of the most intelligent i've seen on this board. Very Happy

init6 · Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2005 8:31 pm Post subject:

And yes, Tal, they have coffee in Russia. Laughing

I'm intending to learn German again as well. I was functional back in 1996 and I want to get there again, but I'd like to become fluent. I don't think it's an unseemly task to work on fluency in English, Russian and German. I'll probably need to learn a fourth, though.

Germany has stagnated, the jobs situation is bad, and I don't want to live there for 12 years just to get citizenship. But Czech Republic and the Baltics are also EU members, the citizenship time is shorter, they're closer to Russia, and I will likely pursue citizenship in one of them (which means I'll need to learn either Czech, Estonian, Latvian or Lithuanian).

Who knows...if I get a good enough journalism gig it won't really matter where I'm a citizen. But on the other hand a lot of wars I might be covering could turn ugly for me personally if I haul out an American passport in the presence of one side or the other. Confused

Talula · Frequent Guest Joined: 01 Aug 2005 Posts: 55

Don't get me wrong, I like the French but every time a visiting French student has come to visit and I get a chance to speak French they have shun me because I didn't speak it just perfect.
"Don't speak my language if you can't speak it well." was the attitude I got so I don't use my French any more. I have never been to Paris and although I am told that it is one of the greatest cities to visit, I really have not wanted to go. There is a nice French man that makes fantastic coffee at the coffee shop I go to and I have never attempted to speak French to him. I don't think I could go back if I offended him with the way I speak French. I took 3 years of French classes and I just didn’t find it fun after my bad experiences so I stopped speaking it. They have some great music though.
Sad

The Russians, Germans and the Japanese are happy to help you speak the language. Besides they are tough to learn and I like a good challenge.

Talula · Frequent Guest Joined: 01 Aug 2005 Posts: 55

init6 · Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2005 9:00 pm Post subject:

Well, it's bad for foreigners. Germans (and all of Europe) aren't saddled with these ridiculous debts like we are in America. That's actually one thing I'm leaving behind - plenty of debt! Laughing

But I was in the East and I'm returning to the East. This is where my friends are, and it's where most of Germany's unemployed are. Western Germany completely dropped the ball on getting the East up to speed. I've only ever met Westerns in the US (they have the money) and all they do is bitch about the "lazy socialist Easterners." I bitch back at them about "elitist Westerners refusing to help their brothers." But, of course, we still get along. That's the beauty of talking politics in Europe - no one takes it personally, unlike here.

I've wanted to go back to Germany ever since I left, more than nine years ago. I finally explained it well enough to my Dad yesterday, who still can't really fathom why I don't think the US is simply the greatest place on Earth. "I've wanted to go back to live ever since I left." So for the last nine years I've basically been pining for my lost homeland! Razz

The strange thing is, I have no German or Russian blood, but they are the two cultures and languages which interest me most in the world.

I've gone through my phases - indifference, excitement, nervousness, shock and now I'm to 'acceptance,' for lack of a better term. I'm ready to go. I have no doubts at all that I will appreciate the US a lot more after spending 11 months in Moscow, but I think 2-3 weeks back "home" before leaving again for Russia is the perfect amount of time for me. Wink

Talula · Frequent Guest Joined: 01 Aug 2005 Posts: 55

I agree.
America is not the greatest country on earth. People don't realize how much more free it is over in Europe. Americans get really uptight about sex, art, and politics. I'm Liberal myself (I know. I know.) I figure when you are having political discussions and people start calling each other names, the debate is over. If you start resorting to name calling then you have run out of points in your argument. I have a no drama policy for my life. Save the drama for movies.
I read somewhere that a lot of Germans wish the Wall was back up because of the East and West problems. I think it is sad that the country can't pull together and help one another get things leveled out.

Ah debt, the American way of life. We wouldn't have anything if it weren't for debt. Why use your money when you can use someone elses money? Razz

e · VIP Joined: 23 Apr 2005 Posts: 654

Sorry to hear that your experiences with the French have been negative. I also made friends with lots of French exchange students while in school here and they were very extremeley helpful in trying to learn French. When I brought up your point about why you French are so nice, they told me that we aren't from Paris, and we French are jerks. Laughing

I learned this myself as I was in Calais in January and I did notice the big difference in terms of niceness and hospitality.

I would just try your French on the guy in the coffee shop. But befriend him in English first. They apparently dont like it when random strangers come at them at what they think is bad French. They think its uncurteous and not modesty. The French are big on manners, curteousness, and modesty and what they percieve is ignorance.

And yeah, Germany has been doing pretty bad of late. I considered going there for grad school and for work, but I was warned away German and non-German friends about how bad things are regarding the jobs situation. I'm planning on going there at the end of the year to assess the situation myself.

Casey: I know what you mean regarding the Germans. I know a Bavarian who can't wait to vote in Merkel saying that "I want to kick out the Socialists, bring our country back on track, and teach those easterners a lesson." I took your position regarding that, and she just remained adamant. This should be interesting how things pan out out there.

manxi · Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:45 pm Post subject:

I'll try and sneak the topic back to Russian men. Hope no one minds Cool

I won't add it after every sentence, just imagine the words : these are generalisations ...

Talula, I agree that Russian men can seem very attractive. I think what makes them attractive to us non-Russians is a kind of vitality they have. At the same time , they can have a quiet intensity, be educated, warm, able to talk about big issues and share deep thoughts without sounding pompous. They manage to listen to a conversation partner and keep their sense of humour , always just under the surface. That's really an attractive combination. They're capable of practical things which is always good Very Happy

and they know how to show very clearly when they find a woman attractive without becoming offensive.

I was never blown away by the "romantic" behaviour/old-fashioned courtesy some people have mentioned. I don't need helping on and off a bus but I don't have a problem with accepting that help. It doesn't make a huge impression on me though.

The problems seem to set in once a relationship is established and the well "courting" stage has finished. Russian men have different expectations from a partner. So for instance, I think it is true that Russian men expect to be the Nr 1 priority in their partner's life. For us, children, parents, perhaps even a best friend would always come first, in Russia that is different. Russian men don't understand that you would, for instance, choose to go and spend time with girlfriends (without him) in valuable weekend time. He wouldn't understand you concentrating on the kids and putting him on the back-burner. I know Russian women who will act as if they are committing a crime speaking to you on the phone while their partner is at home. I think relationships break down because Russian men just don't get the same attention from foreign women and that huge place in their partner's life that they have learnt to expect.

I think too when they settle in the west, they may be generally dissatisfied with the role they play outside the home, feel lessened by it perhaps if they are obliged to do something they are over-qualified for and this reflects back on the home and the partner. I'm not aware of infidelity ever having been a problem with the mixed marriage couples I know here in the west. I doubt Russian men are more prone to affairs than others.

vitalsigns · Lounge Wizard Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 2784

Come back later ...

Чебурашка · Talk Show Host Joined: 23 Sep 2005 Posts: 218

'Attractive' is an impression? So whether he/she says Russian men can 'seem' attractive, it doesn't mean much else than that they can be attractive to people...?
'Seem' has little added value to this kind of statements... it's double.

pechinrules · Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2005 9:07 pm Post subject: american men to russian women.

I have recently been e-mailing to a russian woman and it has been wonderful. Her pictures are hot and she seem to be legit. I want to meet her but It costs a fortune to go from us to russian, any suggestions? I prefer foreign women to american women. American women all are concerned about status and achievement $$$$$$$$$$$, which really gets on my nerves. Are russian women like that? Not saying that I am underachiever but enough already. I dated a woman from Nigeria for three years but our cultures clashed. we are still friends though.

Чебурашка · Talk Show Host Joined: 23 Sep 2005 Posts: 218

Don't know about your location of course and the city in Russia.. But you could try to find a cheap flight to a European city that gives good flight or rail connections to Russia.
This site lists some options for popular budget airline-rail combinations too.

krasatulya · VIP Joined: 29 May 2005 Posts: 571

Pechinrules: I am an American woman engaged to a Russian man. One of the qualities that he loves about me is that I am sensible and conservative with money, and don't live for things like clothing, jewelry, cars, etc. A lot of my girlfriends are this way, too, so it irks me a little bit when I hear American men complaining about spoiled, greedy, American women.

Secondly, I have heard about some of his girl friends in Russia, and to me, they are the ones that seem to be obsessed with material objects. I don't want to generalize about cultures, because aforementioned, it bothers me when people draw these conclusions about American women. I would simply like to bring to your attention that you will most likely run into the same characteristics with Russian women that you so greatly dislike about American women.

pechinrules · Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2005 4:12 am Post subject: responding

I appologize to you, but every american woman I have dated has been that way but after they left me for the other man they found out that the grass wasnt greener on the other side and tried to come back to me. I told them all to take a hike even though it was hard to do that. The only women I found not to do that were foreign. I dated a nigerian woman for three years, her culture and mine were very different that is all. We are still friends. The foreign women I have met are easier to talk to. Ms kratasula why dont you hook me up with one of your friends?