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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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 Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 1:17 am Post subject: My Russian Love - Love hurts |
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Here's the scoop: I'm doing bad here, confused as heck about this Russian girl i was talking to/dating and wanted to get you alls 2 cents on the situation. Just wanted to give you an update and get an opinion from you. Im 24 and she's 20. She was visiting the U.S. on a student visa. Before she left for russia , we both decided to become boyfriend/girlfriend and we both agreed to wait for one another and not talk to anyone else for 10 months. Well i asked her to be my girlfriend and if her answer was yes, i told her to kiss me and she did. She was supposed to move back to america with me in july 08, we talked about this several times. We dated for a month and half before she had to leave. we did all the couples things. well to this date, 9/5 was the last time i spoke with her and saw her and that was when i dropped her off at the airport. her last words to me was i'll write you. I haven't heard from her in 3 weeks and she hasn't wrote me either. I'm in houston, tx and for her to call me is $10/minute, it's expensive. I know she lives in a very small town (Nizhiy Tagil,Russia ) and internet access is tough, but I think she should have contacted me by now, right? I just dont understand how we could have a perfect 1 month relationship and then all of a sudden she just forgets about me when she goes back to russia. she couldn't have been playing me, because she never asked for anything material and never really asked me for anything. when she was in America, she'd always call and ask me to come over to watch tv together or sit at the pool together or just to talk on the phone. When I didn't answer the phone, she'd keep calling me consecutively until she got in contact with me. Also if we were together and my cell phone rang she'd always want to see my phone and who was calling. also when she was in the states she'd call me and ask me to come to her job just so that she could talk to me and also the days we didn't see each other, she'd call me or i'd call and we'd talk on the phone for more than 2 hrs. whenever i was driving, she'd grab my hand and hold it and whenever I saw her she always give me a hug and kiss. if i was driving and i'd look at her, she'd look at me and start smiling and then she would kiss me or grab my hand. she'd tell my buddies that she like me alot, etc. i just can't imagine her being so coldhearted and just forgetting about me like it never happened.I've been down/depressed all weekend and i think im coming to a realization that i'll never see her again. one of my friends was saying maybe she can't get to a phone or computer to contact you and as soon as she does, she will....we seemed like the perfect couple, a match made in heaven and it's just
confusing because I cant see why she would put herself in a situation of coming into a relationship with someone if she knew nothing would come of it. wouldn't she have put the brakes on it long ago or set some boundaries?
what do you think - do you think she just forgot about me? what's your take on this situation? |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 5:58 am Post subject: |
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well...sounds like something is rotten in Denmark! Ok well something could be wrong...I would say the odds are she has a boyfriend. Sad thing is you have no control...so you've given it some time now and no contact? Then...I would say prepare to move on. It's rough and I feel for you but...realistically...long distance at your age...well it's tough.
Good luck
Last edited by surfguy on Fri Sep 28, 2007 7:16 am; edited 1 time in total |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 7:14 am Post subject: |
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| don't get me wrong...I hope it does work out |
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gomer
WayToRussified
Joined: 30 Mar 2007
Posts: 445
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 8:10 am Post subject: |
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| Maybe she was just really 'living in the moment', so to speak. I doubt if she has forgotten about you. Give it awhile longer. |
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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 6:05 pm Post subject: |
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| surfguy wrote: | well...sounds like something is rotten in Denmark! Ok well something could be wrong...I would say the odds are she has a boyfriend. Sad thing is you have no control...so you've given it some time now and no contact? Then...I would say prepare to move on. It's rough and I feel for you but...realistically...long distance at your age...well it's tough.
Good luck |
When I first met her, she told me she didn't have a boyfriend. She said, "she didn't have a need for one." I don't think she has a boyfriend back in Russia, but you never know.
Do you think she could be putting me to a test to see if I really like her and to see if I'll be really worth moving to the U.S. for? |
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MrSpice
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 14 Jul 2003
Posts: 3436
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 8:54 pm Post subject: |
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| I am going to put you to the test - can you summarize your problem in a shorter post? Who has the time to read all that... |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 9:30 pm Post subject: |
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| V8orBetter wrote: | | surfguy wrote: | well...sounds like something is rotten in Denmark! Ok well something could be wrong...I would say the odds are she has a boyfriend. Sad thing is you have no control...so you've given it some time now and no contact? Then...I would say prepare to move on. It's rough and I feel for you but...realistically...long distance at your age...well it's tough.
Good luck |
When I first met her, she told me she didn't have a boyfriend. She said, "she didn't have a need for one." I don't think she has a boyfriend back in Russia, but you never know.
Do you think she could be putting me to a test to see if I really like her and to see if I'll be really worth moving to the U.S. for? |
Nope...seriously I think you should step back and meet someone else and enjoy them all...you should be out discovering instead of limiting yourself. Let things take there course. The fact is you tried...and there comes a point when it is time to accept that...ball is in her court...can't force someone to do something. Step back and look to new horizons. Don't wait for her to do something...let her do something...and if she does not...well then there is your answer. Remeber this...she represents what russia and women have to offer...and there are plenty of russain women and women all over the world who are like her...just need to get out there. Everyone experiences what you are. You said it...Love Hurts
Actually let me add...Mail takes time coming out of Russia...so I suggest be patient but keep your defenses up...and if you have no phone # for her or e-mail or address well then you are helpless until she writes. If she was in love with you then I would suspect that she wrote to you on the plane ride back. Well hang in there and who knows perhaps you will get that which you seek. If she does write and it is a good letter then you will be off on an emotional ride of your life as you will not only experience love and romance...but also the true beauty of russia. Hope it works out and keep us posted. And hopefully one day you will make it to Russia to find your heart. Of course we are coming into winter...so perhaps wait until at least April |
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Daria
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 16 May 2005
Posts: 1136
Location: Канада
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| Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 4:37 am Post subject: Re: My Russian Love - Love hurts |
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| V8orBetter wrote: | | ......... She was visiting the U.S. on a student visa.......... |
| V8orBetter wrote: | | ......... also when she was in the states she'd call me and ask me to come to her job ......... |
Can people work while being on student visa? I didn't know that. |
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Daria
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 16 May 2005
Posts: 1136
Location: Канада
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| Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 4:41 am Post subject: |
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Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian.  |
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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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| Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Daria wrote: | Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian. |
no I don't have her phone number or address. All I have is her email address.
what do you mean it's so russian? |
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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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| Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 9:22 pm Post subject: Re: My Russian Love - Love hurts |
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| Daria wrote: | | V8orBetter wrote: | | ......... She was visiting the U.S. on a student visa.......... |
| V8orBetter wrote: | | ......... also when she was in the states she'd call me and ask me to come to her job ......... |
Can people work while being on student visa? I didn't know that. |
she had J1 R Visa and I'm am making the first step by trying to find her.
I never knew small towns in Russia didn't have white pages. |
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Daria
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 16 May 2005
Posts: 1136
Location: Канада
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| Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2007 11:04 pm Post subject: |
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| V8orBetter wrote: | | Daria wrote: | Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian. |
no I don't have her phone number or address. All I have is her email address.
what do you mean it's so russian? |
Well, it's so typical of a Russian woman to create drama around herself. She is dating you, then she leaves you without leaving her address or a phone number, I bet you don't even know her last name. She probably thought, " If he loves me, he will find me". Russians love to complicate things. |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996
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| Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 5:18 am Post subject: |
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| Daria wrote: | | V8orBetter wrote: | | Daria wrote: | Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian. |
no I don't have her phone number or address. All I have is her email address.
what do you mean it's so russian? |
Well, it's so typical of a Russian woman to create drama around herself. She is dating you, then she leaves you without leaving her address or a phone number, I bet you don't even know her last name. She probably thought, " If he loves me, he will find me". Russians love to complicate things. |
that they do and I certainly know this first hand...russian women love romance...I think much more so than the average woman |
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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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| Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 11:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Daria wrote: | | V8orBetter wrote: | | Daria wrote: | Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian. |
no I don't have her phone number or address. All I have is her email address.
what do you mean it's so russian? |
Well, it's so typical of a Russian woman to create drama around herself. She is dating you, then she leaves you without leaving her address or a phone number, I bet you don't even know her last name. She probably thought, " If he loves me, he will find me". Russians love to complicate things. |
I know her last name and I also know her birthday. |
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V8orBetter
Frequent Guest
Joined: 12 Sep 2007
Posts: 32
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| Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 11:13 pm Post subject: |
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| Daria wrote: | | V8orBetter wrote: | | Daria wrote: | Anyway, why don't you make a first step? Don't tell me you don't have her number...or an address...
Oh Gosh, it's so Russian. |
no I don't have her phone number or address. All I have is her email address.
what do you mean it's so russian? |
Well, it's so typical of a Russian woman to create drama around herself. She is dating you, then she leaves you without leaving her address or a phone number, I bet you don't even know her last name. She probably thought, " If he loves me, he will find me". Russians love to complicate things. |
hmmmm, How do I find her? |
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