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Russians tolerate adultery?
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PhillipFromTexas
Frequent Guest


Joined: 01 Nov 2006
Posts: 49

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 7:38 pm    Post subject: Russians tolerate adultery? Reply with quote

A new book "Lust In Translation" by Pamela Drukerman writes how adultery is tolerated (or not) in different countries. The book says that adultery in Russia is tolerated, like drinking and smoking. What do our Russian friends say?

Новая книга "Жажда В Переводе" Памелой Друкерман пишет, как прелюбодеяние допускают (или не) в различных странах. Книга говорит, что прелюбодеяние в России допускают, как питье и курение. Что говорят наши российские друзья?

Thanks! Спасибо!

Phillip/Филипп
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krasatulya
VIP


Joined: 29 May 2005
Posts: 577

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 9:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I just saw the article this morning on MSN that alludes to this book (which I personally believe is a bunch of crap). As the article touched upon, albeit very briefly, I don't think cheating is condoned in other countries, but rather many women around the world have less rights to speak out/leave a wandering husband. I thought it was very tacky how the author compared cheating in Russia to "another vice, such as cognac or cigars". I had my husband read it and his response was "that is bull-s&#t". From all the strong women I met in Russia, I don't think any of them would tolerate, or not mind, a cheating spouse.
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surfguy
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Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 10:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well...from the Russian women that I know...and all women for that matter...none of them tolerate adultry. But I will say this...the Russian women have all said that Russian men are notorious for this. Also in Japan and in Latin American Countries...adultry is very common. When I was married I never thought about cheating on my wife. Also though I do know Americans who cheat too. So I gues it is a human thing to lust after another even when we are betrothed to someone else. It's unfortunate...in any culture.
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4919
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 10:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

surfguy wrote:
Well...from the Russian women that I know...and all women for that matter...none of them tolerate adultry. But I will say this...the Russian women have all said that Russian men are notorious for this. Also in Japan and in Latin American Countries...adultry is very common. When I was married I never thought about cheating on my wife. Also though I do know Americans who cheat too. So I gues it is a human thing to lust after another even when we are betrothed to someone else. It's unfortunate...in any culture.


I agree. Of all the Russian ladies I have talked to, this is one of their biggest complaints. I don't think they tolerate it at all. In fact any woman who does anywhere, has issues with self esteem.
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krasatulya
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Joined: 29 May 2005
Posts: 577

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 10:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

exactly! Way too many people in the world to put up with someone disrespecting you like that, and potentially bringing you home diseases!
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4919
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

krasatulya wrote:
exactly! Way too many people in the world to put up with someone disrespecting you like that, and potentially bringing you home diseases!


I should have added that some women are also abused, both physically, and mentally, which leads to the self esteem problems. They spend years and years being put down, and told they are useless, or ugly, and that nobody would want them if they left. Some woman are treated worse than dogs. It's really disgusting, but it happens a lot. So it certainly isn't always a situation that they have the courage to change. Words can hurt a person more than fists sometimes.
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

...and don't forget one's own self esteem...I think when we commit to someone else we also commit to ourselves.
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

yes words can hurt...but there are a lot of women out there who also dish it out...including Russian ones. I certainly know this from experience. And I think a lot of em lie...lord knows I've been lied to. This we also see all the time and on this forum...look at all the scams. Geez I wonder if we see American ads trying to scam russians...that would be interesting.
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4919
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

surfguy wrote:
...and don't forget one's own self esteem...I think when we commit to someone else we also commit to ourselves.


Yes, and it can also put you in awkward situations. If someone I know is cheating on their mate, I don't hesitate to tell them what I think, and if that means an end to a friendship, I'll make that sacrifice. Although I hesitate to go and tell the person who's being cheated on. Is that my place to do? I don't know.
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yaros
Just Starting


Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This book suprised me greately. Why does the author think so? Where did she find this information? Anyway, I don't think she spoke with russain women about adultry and tolerance Smile
By the way! A year ago I read an article (I don't remember the author and the source) conserning russian New Year Holiday. It was written that misterious "Babushka" gives presents to little children. It was funny because actually it is "Ded Moroz" who gives presents. (and "Snegurochka" of course)
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4919
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

surfguy wrote:
yes words can hurt...but there are a lot of women out there who also dish it out...including Russian ones. I certainly know this from experience. And I think a lot of em lie...lord knows I've been lied to. This we also see all the time and on this forum...look at all the scams. Geez I wonder if we see American ads trying to scam russians...that would be interesting.


Liars are easy to catch. You just ask lots of questions. A liar will always slip up eventually. Americans scamming Russians? For what reason?
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996

PostPosted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

yorbcbud wrote:
surfguy wrote:
yes words can hurt...but there are a lot of women out there who also dish it out...including Russian ones. I certainly know this from experience. And I think a lot of em lie...lord knows I've been lied to. This we also see all the time and on this forum...look at all the scams. Geez I wonder if we see American ads trying to scam russians...that would be interesting.


Liars are easy to catch. You just ask lots of questions. A liar will always slip up eventually. Americans scamming Russians? For what reason?


don't know of reasons...trying to find out. Of course our laws usually shut these operations down
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4919
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада

PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 3:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's pretty tough to find anyone on the internet, let alone shut them down. Laws are very limited when it comes to online scams.
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard


Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6996

PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 4:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

yorbcbud wrote:
It's pretty tough to find anyone on the internet, let alone shut them down. Laws are very limited when it comes to online scams.


actually in russia they just arrested some people for fraud there...internet etc. What I am getting at is I don't think American women are big on scamming foriegn men...

It seems as though once a month some pathetic soul is being asked for money to fly some russian girl to visit him...it's a joke. I've given lots of gifts and spent lots of money...but only after I was sure that the person was sincere and worthy. Anyway I get a laugh.
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Miami
WayToRussified


Joined: 27 Feb 2006
Posts: 332

PostPosted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 12:14 am    Post subject: Re: Russians tolerate adultery? Reply with quote

PhillipFromTexas wrote:
The book says that adultery in Russia is tolerated, like drinking and smoking. What do our Russian friends say?


Yes that's true. Cheating is like breathing air over there, just part of everyday life.
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