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Crabman
WayToRussified
Joined: 28 Jan 2005
Posts: 401
Location: Middlesex
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 Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 9:49 pm Post subject: |
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Stalin, Kruschev, Brezhnev and Yeltsin are on a train. The train breaks down.
Stalin says "Don't worry comrades, I'll the problem." He leaves the carriage, and returns a few minutes later. "I have had the train crew shot."
The train does not move.
Kruschev says "Don't worry comrades, I'll fix the problem." He leaves the carriage, and returns a few minutes later. "I have had the replacement train crew sent to the East for re-education."
The train does not move.
Brezhnev says "Don't worry comrades, I'll fix the problem." He gets up, draws the curtains of the carriage, and says "If we bounce up and down, we can pretend we're moving."
Yeltsin says: "Don't worry, citizens. I'll fix this problem." He puts down his bottle, staggers to his feet and shouts for a western economist for help.
The train starts moving ... backward! |
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Crabman
WayToRussified
Joined: 28 Jan 2005
Posts: 401
Location: Middlesex
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| Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 10:01 pm Post subject: |
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In a little farmhouse in Georgia:
Little Girl: "Daddy, what did we use for light before we had candles?"
Father: "Electric lightbulbs." |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 10:13 pm Post subject: |
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From the life of russian servicemen:
A soldier keeps a mug upside down and tells the sergeant:
- I can't drink from this mug. It has no opening.
The sergeant examines the mug and says:
- You are right. And besides this, it has no bottom. |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 10:15 pm Post subject: |
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| Crabman wrote: | In a little farmhouse in Georgia:
Little Girl: "Daddy, what did we use for light before we had candles?"
Father: "Electric lightbulbs." |
Is it that bad up there now? A year ago they had that big wine scandal since then I have not taken any interest in the news about Georgia. |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6979
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 1:16 am Post subject: |
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| I went to Georgia in 2005 and I really liked it there...but I hear it is very poor and I only saw that from a distance. With some outside western help Georgia should become a better place. It's a beautiful country with some proud people |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 1:33 am Post subject: |
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| surfguy wrote: | | I went to Georgia in 2005 and I really liked it there...but I hear it is very poor and I only saw that from a distance. With some outside western help Georgia should become a better place. It's a beautiful country with some proud people |
I have a respect for georgians. Indeed a very proud, educated, hospitable nation. |
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RusskiCanadian23
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 1104
Location: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada/Ванкувер, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 9:16 pm Post subject: |
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| vitalsigns wrote: | | surfguy wrote: | | I went to Georgia in 2005 and I really liked it there...but I hear it is very poor and I only saw that from a distance. With some outside western help Georgia should become a better place. It's a beautiful country with some proud people |
I have a respect for georgians. Indeed a very proud, educated, hospitable nation. |
You have no respect for anyone! Why you got a problem with my: "Americans and a Lightbulb" thread? Don't tell me to be quiet on my own forum, SHUT THE FUCK UP YOURSELF, parasha nedoebannaya! Pidoras herov! |
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solis
Talk Show Host
Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 201
Location: Wandering
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 10:08 pm Post subject: |
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| Russki.......Shut up. |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 10:09 pm Post subject: |
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| RusskiCanadian23 wrote: | | vitalsigns wrote: | | surfguy wrote: | | I went to Georgia in 2005 and I really liked it there...but I hear it is very poor and I only saw that from a distance. With some outside western help Georgia should become a better place. It's a beautiful country with some proud people |
I have a respect for georgians. Indeed a very proud, educated, hospitable nation. |
You have no respect for anyone! Why you got a problem with my: "Americans and a Lightbulb" thread? Don't tell me to be quiet on my own forum, SHUT THE FUCK UP YOURSELF, parasha nedoebannaya! Pidoras herov! |
I never laughed so hard for a while on this forum!
Vitusha, rodnoy, da uspokoysya ty. Chto uzh ty svoi nervishki tak portish'. Ya za tebya rasstraivayus'. |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 10:13 pm Post subject: |
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Q: How many Vitushek does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Vitusha doesn't screw them in, his mother does. |
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RusskiCanadian23
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 27 Mar 2007
Posts: 1104
Location: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada/Ванкувер, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 12:18 am Post subject: |
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| vitalsigns wrote: | Q: How many Vitushek does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Vitusha doesn't screw them in, his mother does. |
A. Leave my mother out of this.
B. I don't care what your problem is, but you are not going to run me off this site, as I have as much right to post here as you do. If you don't like it, too bad.
C. You are obviously not Russian. Not on the inside. You called yourself "American" so many times you have forgotten what your true nationality is. I've met people like you before. Never had a pleasant experience with any one of them.
D. Not even my friends get to call me Vitiusha, not my girlfriend, not even my mother. And to you, as I don't even know you, or wish to know you for that matter, it is Victor Nikolaevich.
E. To set matters straight. I am not from Ukraine. Don't know why you'd think that. I am actualy originaly from Irkutsk. That is also where my parents and my brother live.
P.S. Solis, why don't you stay out of this. This is really some problem that Vitalsigns has against me, and I am trying, as you can see, to settle it like a man. He, on the other hand has so far responded only with dumb, immature, childish jokes and remarks. Brainless insults. I honestly don't know how to even cook okroshka, and neither does anyone in my family. Like I said, I am very far from being Ukarinian, also I fail to see what is wrong with being Ukrainian. Vitalsigns, I think, has some deep social issues he needs to work out with himself first. Then talk to other people.
That is all for today. I have to go now. Talk to you all later.
Victor Nikolaevich Riabnikov
Last edited by RusskiCanadian23 on Fri Apr 27, 2007 12:35 am; edited 1 time in total |
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jo-jo-7
Just Starting
Joined: 16 Mar 2010
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 12:22 am Post subject: |
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| RusskiCanadian23 wrote: | | vitalsigns wrote: | Q: How many Vitushek does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Vitusha doesn't screw them in, his mother does. |
A. Leave my mother out of this.
B. I don't care what your problem is, but you are not going to run me off this site, as I have as much right to post here as you do. If you don't like it, too bad.
C. You are obviously not Russian. Not on the inside. You called yourself "American" so many times you have forgotten what your true nationality is. I've met people like you before. Never had a pleasant experience with any one of them.
D. Not even my friends get to call me Vitiusha, not my girlfriend, not even my mother. And to you, as I don't even know you, or wish to know you forr that matter, it is Victor Nikolaevich.
E. To set matters straight. I am not from Ukraine. Don't know why you'd think that. I am actualy originaly from Irkutsk. That is also where my parents and my brother live.
P.S. Solis, why don't you stay out of this. This is really some problem that Vitalsigns has against me, and I am trying, as you can see, to settle it like a man. He, on the other hand has so far responded only with dumb, immature, childish jokes and remarks. Brainless insults. I honestly don't know how to even cook okroshka, and neither does anyone in my family. Like I said, I am very far from being Ukarinian, also I fail to see what is wrong with being Ukrainian. Vitalsigns, I think, has some deep social issues he needs to work out with himself first. Then talk to other people.
That is all for today. I have to go now. Talk to you all later.
Victor Nikolaevich Riabnikov |
One more before dinner....Victor is a great name and your middle and last name sound Nobel...which I think you are....don't let the insults get to ya.....  |
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Fire_Goddess
Guest
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| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 12:30 am Post subject: |
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| Vitalsigns is jealous of you Russki thats why he makes disparaging comments. Ignore him, and he will move to the next person. |
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vitalsigns
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
Posts: 2784
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| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 1:41 am Post subject: |
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| Fire_Goddess wrote: | | Vitalsigns is jealous of you Russki thats why he makes disparaging comments. Ignore him, and he will move to the next person. |
The only time I get jealous if other men start talking to you on this forum. |
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Fire_Goddess
Guest
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| Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 1:43 am Post subject: |
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| vitalsigns wrote: |
The only time I get jealous if other men start talking to you on this forum. |
Oohhh vitalsigns  |
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