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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6979
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 Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:12 am Post subject: |
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| Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "First row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Long, loud applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) ...A dejected voice in the back: "It was me" (Sobs.) Stalin leans forward: "Bless you, comrade!" |
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jo-jo-7
Just Starting
Joined: 16 Mar 2010
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:19 am Post subject: |
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| StephenB. wrote: | Jo Jo, did you ever watched, "Are you Being Served?"...too funny...Also, Absolutely Fabulous and Little Britain...  |
No, there is another one, but I cannot remember the name, based in a department store and it is hilarious. I will think of it later, while I am lying in bed. I hate it when I do that, I never sleep. |
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StephenB.
VIP
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 807
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:29 am Post subject: |
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| jo jo 7 wrote: | | StephenB. wrote: | | Jo Jo, did you ever watched, "Are you Being Served?"...too funny...Also, Absolutely Fabulous and Little Britain... |
No, there is another one, but I cannot remember the name, based in a department store and it is hilarious. I will think of it later, while I am lying in bed. I hate it when I do that, I never sleep. |
"Are You Being Served?" takes place in a department store, Mrs. Slocum, Ms. Brahms, Mr. Humphreys, Mr. Peacock etc... |
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StephenB.
VIP
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 807
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:35 am Post subject: |
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| surfguy wrote: | | Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "First row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Long, loud applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) ...A dejected voice in the back: "It was me" (Sobs.) Stalin leans forward: "Bless you, comrade!" |
"Comrade Brezhnev, is it true that you collect political jokes?" — "Yes" — "And how many have you collected so far?" — "Three and a half labor camps." |
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jo-jo-7
Just Starting
Joined: 16 Mar 2010
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 6:50 am Post subject: |
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| StephenB. wrote: | | jo jo 7 wrote: | | StephenB. wrote: | | Jo Jo, did you ever watched, "Are you Being Served?"...too funny...Also, Absolutely Fabulous and Little Britain... |
No, there is another one, but I cannot remember the name, based in a department store and it is hilarious. I will think of it later, while I am lying in bed. I hate it when I do that, I never sleep. |
"Are You Being Served?" takes place in a department store, Mrs. Slocum, Ms. Brahms, Mr. Humphreys, Mr. Peacock etc... |
Yes..Yes that is it...I couldn't remember the names...love this one. I guess this one is your favorite? |
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4903
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 7:39 am Post subject: |
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| RusskiCanadian23 wrote: | | StephenB. wrote: | | surfguy wrote: | | RusskiCanadian23 wrote: | | surfguy wrote: | | Well certainly ruskii's joke is not as bad as...How come jewish people's noses are so big? ....Air is Free! |
This is one a buddy told me in Russia: "Why are Jews' noses so huge: that's because when God was handing out noses to different people, when he created them, and the first Jew came to him and asked, "God, is it for free?" God answered: "Yes". The Jew said: 'Oh, then give me the biggest one!". |
Let's see what all loving BC comes up with? Ok Ok we gotta tell jokes on all peoples because...well I hate to discriminate |
LOL |
hehe... I'm sorry, BC, but that is funny...
Hey, did you know, that BC Bud, is what the Washington State police calls illegal dope imported there from BC! I'm serious, I've read this in a newspaper! |
Actually, Victor, that is funny. And I'm glad someone finally got the meaning of yorbcbud. Cudos, buddy. |
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4903
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 7:47 am Post subject: |
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| jo jo 7 wrote: |
Yes..Yes that is it...I couldn't remember the names...love this one. I guess this one is your favorite? |
Did you ever see "Fawlty Towers" with John Cleese, from Monty Python? |
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MrSpice
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 14 Jul 2003
Posts: 3431
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 8:12 am Post subject: |
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| bswaminathan wrote: |
What are you talking about.....Mr Spice |
I am saying that many Indian people smell like elephant's ass.
They eat all this hot curry stuff and that stuff smells. |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6979
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 9:04 am Post subject: |
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| MrSpice wrote: | | bswaminathan wrote: |
What are you talking about.....Mr Spice |
I am saying that many Indian people smell like elephant's ass.
They eat all this hot curry stuff and that stuff smells. |
I've never smelt an elephants ass...and I actually like curry...but I do have to say...people from India, Pakistan, Africa, etc...lord are there some stinky people in this world. Although I'm sure at times I smell pretty ripe too |
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bswaminathan
Lounge Lizard
Joined: 09 Oct 2007
Posts: 164
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:00 am Post subject: |
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I am saying that many Indian people smell like elephant's ass. They eat all this hot curry stuff and that stuff smells.
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Have you ever been to INDIA, have you ever seen ganges,Sindh & godavari?
We don't use perfumes to attract women. We don't have to.... we are not brought up in that way.
For a elephant its 'residues' are considered to be rich in medicinal value. Elephant is worth even after its death.
how worth are you? its worth that you better stop your anti Asian remarks. DO u have any bad experience with any Asian women? better try in your side. with a pizza they will fall in your feet quickly. |
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4903
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:15 am Post subject: |
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| MrSpice wrote: | | bswaminathan wrote: |
What are you talking about.....Mr Spice |
I am saying that many Indian people smell like elephant's ass.
They eat all this hot curry stuff and that stuff smells. |
That's rude, Spice. I have many Indian friends, and they don't stink. I think their food is overwhelmingly spicy, ( except chapatis ) You smell kind of bad, yourself, right now. Did you shit yourself?
Last edited by yorbcbud on Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:24 am; edited 1 time in total |
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4903
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:21 am Post subject: |
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| surfguy wrote: | | MrSpice wrote: | | bswaminathan wrote: |
What are you talking about.....Mr Spice |
I am saying that many Indian people smell like elephant's ass.
They eat all this hot curry stuff and that stuff smells. |
I've never smelt an elephants ass...and I actually like curry...but I do have to say...people from India, Pakistan, Africa, etc...lord are there some stinky people in this world. Although I'm sure at times I smell pretty ripe too |
Look in the mirror, and inhale deeply. ( feel free to substitute "Horse", for " Elephant", for a more "Western " appeal, if you like). |
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surfguy
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 6979
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:32 am Post subject: |
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India is a beautiful place and there are some beautiful people there...and I'm sure to people from India...a guy like BCBUD would would be quite offensive smelling. And on a daily basis too.
Oh BTW ken...read my whole post...  Oh and let me know if you'd like me to mail you up some Aqua Velva, Some Irish Springs, and some Right Guard...I'm sure you can use some. LOL...and who knows maybe a women from India might find you irresistable! Or if you prefer women closer to the bus...maybe one of the Inuit villages will have a lady friend available to keep you warm this summer you! If you don't want me to mail you the goods...Maybe your next door neigbor Kris Kringle or Father Frost will put these items in your stocking this year. Although was them before you hang them up...I'm sure they stink too. |
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yorbcbud
Lounge Wizard
Joined: 17 Feb 2006
Posts: 4903
Location: Сорренто, Британская Колумбия, Канада
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:40 am Post subject: |
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| surfguy wrote: | India is a beautiful place and there are some beautiful people there...and I'm sure to people from India...a guy like BCBUD would would be quite offensive smelling. And on a daily basis too.
Oh BTW ken...read my whole post... Oh and let me know if you'd like me to mail you up some Aqua Velva, Some Irish Springs, and some Right Guard...I'm sure you can use some. LOL...and who knows maybe a women from India might find you irresistable! Or if you prefer women closer to the bus...maybe one of the Inuit villages will have a lady friend available to keep you warm this summer you! If you don't want me to mail you the goods...Maybe your next door neigbor Kris Kringle or Father Frost will put these items in your stocking this year. Although was them before you hang them up...I'm sure they stink too. |
I'll have you know, I smell like roses, even when I crap. Besides, how do you know how I smell? You have been rubbing your nose on my windows, again? |
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bswaminathan
Lounge Lizard
Joined: 09 Oct 2007
Posts: 164
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| Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:44 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | but I do have to say...people from India, Pakistan, Africa, etc...lord are there some stinky people in this world. |
if so ask your men in congress to stop imports from these countries and ban the INDIAn restaurants there. Indian foods are spicy, yes, thats the way we like, its nothing wrong in that. One can't expect others to follow the same taste of you.
Remember, "NO TWO WATCHES WILL SHOW THE SAME TIME"
Even we don't like Pizza as it look like 100 people spitted over a bread with some rotten vegetables and finally baked it. It has no nutrition and health wise its of no use simply you can satisfy your appetite. Hope you heard of KFC(Kentucky Fried Chicken) that has been caught couple of times as they served diseased chicks. Also Mc Donald chief has been sentenced as the restaurant served food stuffs which is rich in Pig Extract.
Go to some of the popular INDIAn restaurant in your place like, "SARAVANA BHAVAN". Ask for a plate of "Idly" taste it, you will find the difference. I'm not joking, try atleast 2 times with different varieties of INDIAn food. but try only vegetarian. |
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